123 Flash Chat > Chat Rooms > Alzheimers - Specialty Chats > Message History
DateTimeFromToMessage
2013-05-01 06:29:50 PM lynnet Celeste - waiting for answer to Cathy's question here
2013-05-01 06:29:59 PM cchase I don't know where your parents are?
2013-05-01 06:30:18 PM cchase a little scary for them
2013-05-01 06:30:28 PM tamela50 say they will be around shortly and redirect
2013-05-01 06:30:28 PM cchase what was Cathy's questions
2013-05-01 06:30:33 PM cchase sorru
2013-05-01 06:30:33 PM mayamoo3 yes. I do not know. Nothing to be gained by telling them they are dead. just make them sad
2013-05-01 06:30:35 PM bernlewis The touching could simply be the need for that closeness if its with another person. If it's by themself maybe they have a wedgie or something else is going on
2013-05-01 06:30:36 PM cchase sorry
2013-05-01 06:30:40 PM cathymayle She always tells me to call them for her....I have to change the subject
2013-05-01 06:30:45 PM taggirl500 I let them know they will be back later
2013-05-01 06:30:56 PM tamela50 do not say anything to agitate
2013-05-01 06:31:13 PM cchase Cathy - have you heard about therapeutic fiblets
2013-05-01 06:31:23 PM lynnet I pretend to call them on my cell phone and say there is no answer - they forget and it's over with no problems
2013-05-01 06:31:28 PM tamela50 have to use the restroom
2013-05-01 06:31:31 PM cchase yes - good one - they will be back later
2013-05-01 06:31:32 PM taggirl500 They mayb be hurting if they are touching themselves
2013-05-01 06:31:45 PM cchase maybe pain yes
2013-05-01 06:31:47 PM cathymayle urinary infection
2013-05-01 06:31:55 PM cchase maybe they have to go to the bathroom
2013-05-01 06:32:00 PM cchase that simple
2013-05-01 06:32:02 PM lynnet are we talking sexual stimulation or medical?
2013-05-01 06:32:03 PM wellprepared85 I have a residents that says my brother coming and he saids that every day. And I just agree with him and say that he is coming.
2013-05-01 06:32:04 PM tamela50 yes most likely
2013-05-01 06:32:16 PM cchase good going
2013-05-01 06:32:18 PM lynnet me too wellp we are on the same page
2013-05-01 06:32:24 PM bernlewis maybe their touching themselves because it simply feels good much like children when the are discovering their bodies
2013-05-01 06:32:26 PM cchase you need to step into there world
2013-05-01 06:32:31 PM taggirl500 My residents normally bounce if they have to potty
2013-05-01 06:32:33 PM wellprepared85 I agree @lynnet
2013-05-01 06:32:42 PM kmcooley agreeing and changing the subject does work well...
2013-05-01 06:32:51 PM cchase (lol)
2013-05-01 06:33:00 PM tamela50 use postive dont be negative
2013-05-01 06:33:06 PM kmcooley ...two subjects going here...
2013-05-01 06:33:07 PM wellprepared85 :)
2013-05-01 06:33:11 PM cchase always agree
2013-05-01 06:33:14 PM lynnet the one thing i learned in training is to agree - if they say the sky is red, it is.
2013-05-01 06:33:16 PM cchase never try to argue
2013-05-01 06:33:20 PM lynnet Don't not argue'
2013-05-01 06:33:33 PM cchase you will lose
2013-05-01 06:33:37 PM lynnet right
2013-05-01 06:33:37 PM taggirl500 Why argue you just upset them
2013-05-01 06:33:42 PM lynnet and it agitates them
2013-05-01 06:33:43 PM cchase an arguement
2013-05-01 06:33:48 PM taggirl500 I dont like seeing them upset
2013-05-01 06:33:49 PM wellprepared85 never argue, make them happy/ never sad
2013-05-01 06:33:51 PM bernlewis you have to be careful agreeing but you can validate them by repeating verifying what they area feeling
2013-05-01 06:33:52 PM lynnet i have had to tell this to caremanagers
2013-05-01 06:33:53 PM tamela50 breaks any trust and security they have built about you if you agitate
2013-05-01 06:33:55 PM nvite664 you will always lose
2013-05-01 06:34:13 PM hhammondg You can always "have to go ask someone else..."
2013-05-01 06:34:14 PM cchase trust - what about that?
2013-05-01 06:34:19 PM lynnet yes
2013-05-01 06:34:33 PM taggirl500 smiling builds trust
2013-05-01 06:34:34 PM cchase is that critical? trust
2013-05-01 06:34:34 PM hhammondg NEVER promise anything that you can't deliver on IMMEDIATELY!
2013-05-01 06:34:40 PM taggirl500 Always smile
2013-05-01 06:34:44 PM 131570 Yes trust is critical
2013-05-01 06:34:45 PM nvite664 I think it very much is
2013-05-01 06:34:47 PM wellprepared85 yes , trust is very important
2013-05-01 06:34:48 PM taggirl500 YES!!
2013-05-01 06:34:50 PM kmcooley yes
2013-05-01 06:34:52 PM tamela50 evry incounter you build security and trust
2013-05-01 06:34:53 PM cathymayle yes
2013-05-01 06:34:58 PM cchase good everyone
2013-05-01 06:35:09 PM cchase once you get that
2013-05-01 06:35:17 PM cchase you will need to reinforce it
2013-05-01 06:35:24 PM cchase each and every moment
2013-05-01 06:35:28 PM hhammondg They may not remember specifically what you didn't come through on, but they will associate you with BAD FEELINGS if you break their trust by not following through.
2013-05-01 06:35:29 PM bernlewis Yes because their world is literally being taken from their mind. Who and what s left is all they have to hold on to
2013-05-01 06:35:29 PM tamela50 arguing all the time will discourage them and brek their trust in you
2013-05-01 06:35:38 PM lynnet Celeste how do you deal with 'sexual' issues. Have had residents kissing and so forth. I know in Assisted Living residents have those rights, but what about residents with AD
2013-05-01 06:35:38 PM 131570 Even if they can't remember you to have a built trust, you can still be reassuring and comforting which would provide trust
2013-05-01 06:35:57 PM angel4aml18 especially with the nursing staff - I have had some say "you are 90 your mother has been dead for a long time"!
2013-05-01 06:36:11 PM cchase sexuality is very common
2013-05-01 06:36:20 PM tamela50 not cool it confuses them
2013-05-01 06:36:22 PM cchase meaning issues of sexuality
2013-05-01 06:36:28 PM lynnet but do you let them have at??? do you stop them???
2013-05-01 06:36:33 PM cchase do not make a big deal about it
2013-05-01 06:36:43 PM cchase but gently redirect
2013-05-01 06:36:56 PM cchase what is redirect?
2013-05-01 06:36:57 PM cheyanna1 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:36:58 PM bernlewis They are going to have a problem with me in assisted living. So get ready for it. Libdo will be raging:)
2013-05-01 06:36:59 PM tamela50 read sexuality and long term care...good book
2013-05-01 06:37:03 PM lynnet thank you! I even asked my director and she didn't know what to do
2013-05-01 06:37:05 PM wellprepared85 Agree @cchase
2013-05-01 06:37:14 PM hhammondg It can be difficult for the famiilies to see mom or dad with a "stranger," but the residents are operating on a very "be here now" status.
2013-05-01 06:37:20 PM 131570 directing the focus on another thing
2013-05-01 06:37:27 PM cchase how
2013-05-01 06:37:33 PM cchase how do you redirect
2013-05-01 06:37:55 PM taggirl500 I have to go my 4 year old has lost her horses
2013-05-01 06:37:56 PM tamela50 tell them you need their help with something
2013-05-01 06:37:58 PM cchase provide an example
2013-05-01 06:38:00 PM nvite664 It depends why you are needing t redirect in the first place
2013-05-01 06:38:00 PM cathymayle Interrupt them and give them something else todo
2013-05-01 06:38:17 PM 131570 Bring in an item such as a magazine with nice pictures, walk/wheel them over to a fish tank or aviary if you have it...or just to a window
2013-05-01 06:38:25 PM taggirl500 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:38:26 PM mayamoo3 anything that catches thier attention
2013-05-01 06:38:28 PM lynnet That Supreme Court Justice, Sandra Day O'Connor's husband had AD and fell for another woman and Sandra said she just went with it - had to watch him holding her hand when she visited - must have been hard for her after being married for 50 years
2013-05-01 06:38:35 PM cchase what do you do with a child who might want to stick a finger in a socket
2013-05-01 06:38:43 PM bernlewis I had a couple who would do that and follow eachother groping as they walked. fortunately we were in with children so I could use that. But my major concern was that if the lady got in the bathroom with him and realized she was alone would she freak. So I had staff discretely show up and that would redirect them . For a while:)
2013-05-01 06:38:46 PM wellprepared85 I would try to interrupt and give them a activity or start a conversation
2013-05-01 06:38:48 PM hhammondg In a room, behind a closed door....why do we need to be involved?
2013-05-01 06:38:51 PM kmcooley I offered a couple apple juice today...that worked.
2013-05-01 06:38:56 PM cchase yes
2013-05-01 06:38:57 PM tamela50 they went that route on Grey's Anatomy
2013-05-01 06:39:06 PM lynnet So Celeste, redirect is the key, is that right?
2013-05-01 06:39:29 PM cchase because they do not know if they have presence of mind to be sexual active
2013-05-01 06:39:29 PM nvite664 if it is behaivor remove them from the situation and put them by someone else that might not make them so upset that seem to work most of the time
2013-05-01 06:39:36 PM lynnet I see
2013-05-01 06:39:41 PM 131570 ....welll with a child you might tell them that's not right but, I think with dementia you shouldn't necesarily tell them 'NO'
2013-05-01 06:39:46 PM cchase yes - redirect is the whole ball game
2013-05-01 06:39:51 PM lynnet thank you
2013-05-01 06:40:03 PM cchase your welcome
2013-05-01 06:40:10 PM cchase I do not every say no
2013-05-01 06:40:19 PM cchase not even to a child
2013-05-01 06:40:32 PM cchase I get them focused on something else
2013-05-01 06:40:33 PM nvite664 I tend to say wait alot does that work better
2013-05-01 06:40:40 PM tamela50 in the end they are just looking for companionship
2013-05-01 06:40:55 PM cchase okay so here's a scenario
2013-05-01 06:40:59 PM cchase everyone ready
2013-05-01 06:41:03 PM cathymayle yep
2013-05-01 06:41:03 PM 131570 I thknk the difference here is that children can still learn not to stick thier finger in a light socket and a dementia resident has forgotten
2013-05-01 06:41:06 PM wellprepared85 YES
2013-05-01 06:41:09 PM kmcooley yes
2013-05-01 06:41:35 PM motterjx yea
2013-05-01 06:41:40 PM hhammondg yes
2013-05-01 06:41:41 PM cchase a woman walks up to you and says that you stole her pocket book what do you say or do?
2013-05-01 06:41:56 PM mayamoo3 apologize and redirect
2013-05-01 06:42:01 PM cchase how
2013-05-01 06:42:13 PM cathymayle left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:42:18 PM angel4aml18 ask her what color her pocketbook is
2013-05-01 06:42:27 PM nvite664 No im pretty sure your daughter took it home yeaterday we will call her if you want and check this normally works
2013-05-01 06:42:30 PM motterjx could you ask her where she last saw it
2013-05-01 06:42:31 PM hhammondg Ask them to tell you what it looks like...go to help look for it...
2013-05-01 06:42:36 PM cathymayle enter the chat room
2013-05-01 06:42:37 PM tamela50 im sorry your pocketbook is lost let me help you look for it
2013-05-01 06:42:39 PM mayamoo3 I'm sorry you can't find your wallet. I have sonething to show you(Magazine, Puzle)
2013-05-01 06:42:47 PM cchase yes
2013-05-01 06:42:51 PM lynnet I would agree with Tamela
2013-05-01 06:42:53 PM 131570 You apologize to her, tell her you will look for it, and in the meantime maybe she could look at the newspaper
2013-05-01 06:42:56 PM cathymayle me too
2013-05-01 06:42:56 PM cchase who said I am sorry it's lost
2013-05-01 06:43:02 PM wellprepared85 Im sorry but I can help you find it.
2013-05-01 06:43:04 PM cchase validate how they feel
2013-05-01 06:43:12 PM cchase it must be scary
2013-05-01 06:43:23 PM cchase to loose your pocket book
2013-05-01 06:43:34 PM lynnet Tamela said it and i agreed
2013-05-01 06:43:37 PM cchase what's next - she keeps saying you took it
2013-05-01 06:43:44 PM mayamoo3 gotta go. knitting calls
2013-05-01 06:43:46 PM mayamoo3 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:43:46 PM motterjx what if they accuse another resident of taking it and then that resident gets confused?
2013-05-01 06:43:51 PM hhammondg We have gents who are afraid to eat meals, because they have "lost" their wallet. We tell them it is "all inclusive" like any good resort.
2013-05-01 06:44:03 PM cathymayle I have a resident who just started with alzheimers and she is always accusing one of our housekeepers of stealing her clothes
2013-05-01 06:44:17 PM cchase okay Cathy
2013-05-01 06:44:25 PM cchase tell us what goes on with that
2013-05-01 06:44:27 PM cchase please
2013-05-01 06:44:33 PM wellprepared85 I would talk to her and keep her calm. I would ask the staff if they came across her pocketbook.
2013-05-01 06:44:37 PM tamela50 me me me
2013-05-01 06:44:38 PM 131570 well eventually if the situation persists, you might have to walk away so she does not get agitated any further
2013-05-01 06:44:45 PM littlered14 Ask if you can help look for it and that you will notify the staff to be looking for it.
2013-05-01 06:44:47 PM cchase :)
2013-05-01 06:44:48 PM hhammondg Tell them they can fill out a report at the nurse's station...
2013-05-01 06:44:49 PM lynnet YOu could say, "Well, if I did it must look like mine and I did by mistake" let's go look and see if we can find both of them
2013-05-01 06:44:53 PM cathymayle There is no talking to her...she cussed the housekeeper out today
2013-05-01 06:44:57 PM cchase yes - yes
2013-05-01 06:44:58 PM kmcooley it is hard on the families who "stole" the car and put mom or dad in this place...
2013-05-01 06:45:12 PM cchase who said ask if you can help look for it?
2013-05-01 06:45:13 PM lynnet was that yes to me Celeste
2013-05-01 06:45:13 PM cathymayle We have sent her out three times for behavior issues and nothing changes
2013-05-01 06:45:19 PM tamela50 me me me
2013-05-01 06:45:21 PM littlered14 me
2013-05-01 06:45:29 PM cchase miss me me me
2013-05-01 06:45:49 PM cchase quite a few of you got it right
2013-05-01 06:45:53 PM cchase good work
2013-05-01 06:45:58 PM tamela50 yes have a couple that loses her purse on a weekly basis
2013-05-01 06:46:00 PM wellprepared85 Good night everyone/ enjoyed the chat
2013-05-01 06:46:00 PM bernlewis My brain is frozen hopefully after the search and validation enough time goes by that hey will forget for a while and i could some up with something else:(
2013-05-01 06:46:05 PM cchase take care
2013-05-01 06:46:08 PM cathymayle How would you address this resident Celeste
2013-05-01 06:46:11 PM wellprepared85 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:46:19 PM cchase As mentioned
2013-05-01 06:46:27 PM cchase it must feel scary
2013-05-01 06:46:40 PM cchase I would be happy to help find it
2013-05-01 06:46:40 PM cathymayle ok
2013-05-01 06:46:44 PM cchase let's look
2013-05-01 06:46:44 PM tamela50 say your sorry it is missing and offer to look for it
2013-05-01 06:46:50 PM lynnet right
2013-05-01 06:46:52 PM cchase but I am hungry
2013-05-01 06:47:05 PM cchase I would love to get a sandwich
2013-05-01 06:47:07 PM tamela50 lets grt a cookie from the kitchen
2013-05-01 06:47:07 PM hhammondg rather like being lost in a hotel that you can't get out of---"Hotel California" anyone?
2013-05-01 06:47:09 PM lynnet Shall we get a sandwich first and then look for it
2013-05-01 06:47:11 PM cchase before we look for it
2013-05-01 06:47:27 PM cchase what then
2013-05-01 06:47:33 PM tamela50 yes or offer drink
2013-05-01 06:47:37 PM cchase what did you do?
2013-05-01 06:47:42 PM kmcooley long way to the kitchen
2013-05-01 06:47:42 PM lynnet with my residents they will forget by that time
2013-05-01 06:47:47 PM lynnet you have re-directed
2013-05-01 06:47:49 PM cchase long long way
2013-05-01 06:47:50 PM kmcooley distract
2013-05-01 06:47:51 PM 131570 YOu redirected
2013-05-01 06:47:52 PM cchase yes
2013-05-01 06:47:53 PM tamela50 yes usually
2013-05-01 06:48:04 PM cchase while sitting and eating
2013-05-01 06:48:19 PM cchase you might talk about the bird outside
2013-05-01 06:48:19 PM tamela50 have one that forgets he has eatten
2013-05-01 06:48:22 PM hhammondg talk about something else
2013-05-01 06:48:32 PM cchase or the movie or book you read/saw
2013-05-01 06:48:35 PM lynnet yes
2013-05-01 06:48:39 PM cchase keep the conversation moving
2013-05-01 06:48:46 PM angel4aml18 thanks for the great re-directing ideas - have a good night everyone!
2013-05-01 06:48:50 PM kmcooley most of ours forget they've eaten!
2013-05-01 06:48:58 PM cathymayle good nith
2013-05-01 06:48:59 PM lynnet same here kmcoo
2013-05-01 06:48:59 PM cchase she forgot - hopefully!!! :)
2013-05-01 06:49:00 PM bernlewis Celeste I am in a ad program for practicum that is run like a social club. The goal seems to be to get them socially involved for community mental health (many of our adults) but I can't help but think that you activity planning should be directed to not only a group but some people should be targeted to plan forthat allows the whole group to participate in. Am I on the right track or is that more a therapies mindset
2013-05-01 06:49:13 PM angel4aml18 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:49:26 PM hhammondg Invite someone else to come sit with. Conversations are pretty one-sided on our AD/memory unit....
2013-05-01 06:49:50 PM kmcooley I take them out one door and then suggest we enter the room we just left...through a different door ...usually works (small facility)
2013-05-01 06:49:57 PM cathymayle She's not on the alzheimers unit yet
2013-05-01 06:49:59 PM lynnet bern - do you think one on one is better ? not sure what you're saying
2013-05-01 06:50:04 PM cchase groups are wonderful bern
2013-05-01 06:50:21 PM cchase but
2013-05-01 06:50:43 PM cchase at times you get better results with smaller size
2013-05-01 06:50:50 PM lynnet yes
2013-05-01 06:50:51 PM cathymayle true
2013-05-01 06:50:51 PM hhammondg I hat one man who had to go into and out of the dining room door 3 times before he forgot he wanted to kick my a** for stealing his car....
2013-05-01 06:50:52 PM lynnet i agree
2013-05-01 06:50:55 PM nvite664 thank you everyone have a great rest of your week
2013-05-01 06:50:57 PM hhammondg had one
2013-05-01 06:50:58 PM nvite664 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:51:04 PM cathymayle lol
2013-05-01 06:51:08 PM lynnet lol
2013-05-01 06:51:09 PM cchase ouch!
2013-05-01 06:51:13 PM bernlewis No but some just follow because the group is doing it and that's considered successful. but I've talked to some of the adults and there is so much more in them that could be used to enrich their lives and I think it could be addressed in the program
2013-05-01 06:51:16 PM tamela50 Night all..have a great week!
2013-05-01 06:51:23 PM kmcooley between the group activities and meals is when the 1:1 distraction activities are needed here
2013-05-01 06:51:29 PM cathymayle night
2013-05-01 06:51:34 PM tamela50 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:51:36 PM cchase interest based programs
2013-05-01 06:51:43 PM cchase good night cathy
2013-05-01 06:51:49 PM hhammondg left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:51:52 PM cathymayle left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:51:57 PM lynnet I feel badly when all my activites are 'group' centered (per my director) I feel some of the late stage AD need one on one
2013-05-01 06:52:20 PM cchase yes AD will require some 1-1
2013-05-01 06:52:23 PM cchase for certain
2013-05-01 06:52:28 PM lynnet Thank you
2013-05-01 06:52:48 PM bernlewis I used to position my staff or students next to those who were lower functioning so they could cue them and connect individually during the group
2013-05-01 06:52:57 PM cchase you all did great for this class
2013-05-01 06:53:04 PM lynnet Thank you for having us
2013-05-01 06:53:18 PM lynnet Will you do more this second half of the course
2013-05-01 06:53:20 PM cchase thank you all for attending -
2013-05-01 06:53:23 PM kmcooley Thank you
2013-05-01 06:53:26 PM cchase Yes
2013-05-01 06:53:34 PM cchase I also do the ADH chat as well
2013-05-01 06:53:34 PM 131570 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:53:35 PM lynnet Great!!! Good night all
2013-05-01 06:53:43 PM cchase look for it
2013-05-01 06:53:49 PM lynnet left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:53:56 PM cchase email me with any questions after this chat
2013-05-01 06:53:57 PM bernlewis adh?
2013-05-01 06:54:01 PM kmcooley 5/22/13
2013-05-01 06:54:09 PM bernlewis thanks I will
2013-05-01 06:54:11 PM cchase Adult Day Health
2013-05-01 06:54:33 PM cchase bernie cchase@activitydirector .net
2013-05-01 06:55:01 PM cchase you all are more than welcome to email as well
2013-05-01 06:55:16 PM bernlewis great i'm working on a year long educational program for the residents including nutrition and physical care
2013-05-01 06:55:20 PM cchase keep up the super work
2013-05-01 06:55:37 PM kmcooley that sounds neat...
2013-05-01 06:55:55 PM cchase fantastic bernie
2013-05-01 06:56:10 PM bernlewis sometimes I bite off more than I can ches:)
2013-05-01 06:56:12 PM cchase I would be interested
2013-05-01 06:56:20 PM cchase me too
2013-05-01 06:56:25 PM littlered14 left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:56:48 PM bernlewis Ok Ill run some ideas by you. Got to go I hear "Grandma in the background.
2013-05-01 06:57:12 PM cchase I am pooped long day be well
2013-05-01 06:57:21 PM kmcooley yes!!!
2013-05-01 06:57:30 PM cchase good job
2013-05-01 06:57:39 PM bernlewis left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:57:42 PM cchase hope you found the info helpful
2013-05-01 06:57:59 PM kmcooley ...took some notes...
2013-05-01 06:58:10 PM kmcooley thanks bye all
2013-05-01 06:58:12 PM kmcooley left the chat room
2013-05-01 06:58:14 PM cchase I am only an email away
2013-05-01 07:00:55 PM motterjx thank you!
2013-05-01 07:01:34 PM cchase did not hear too much from you - did you enjoy this chat?
2013-05-01 07:02:00 PM motterjx yes i did! i am more of a reader than typing much haha
2013-05-01 07:02:18 PM cchase well then
2013-05-01 07:02:34 PM cchase sleep well tonight
2013-05-01 07:02:53 PM motterjx thank you! good nite
2013-05-01 07:03:12 PM cchase might
2013-05-01 07:03:16 PM cchase night
2013-05-01 07:03:20 PM motterjx left the chat room
2013-05-01 07:03:33 PM cchase left the chat room
2013-05-01 07:15:46 PM sarahdecollibus left the chat room
2013-05-02 10:55:47 AM sarahdecollibus enter the chat room
2013-05-02 10:55:59 AM sarahdecollibus left the chat room
2013-05-02 05:35:42 PM kathyhughes enter the chat room
2013-05-02 05:35:55 PM kathyhughes We are chatting in the Open Discussion Room tonight 5/2/13 (Tp) See you there Kathy
2013-05-02 05:36:15 PM kathyhughes left the chat room

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